People often talk about having faith in each other. When we do that, I suspect that we are usually referring to a relationship with someone who “won’t let us down, won’t betray us”. But what really lies within that belief? What is true faith between two people, or within a group of people?
In religious communities, I would hope that we are trying to model our relationships on those we aspire to have with our God and which our God offers to us. The way we interpret that relationship may well influence the way we see our interaction with each other. If our God is gracious and forgiving, being faithful to each other may, hopefully, mean that we are that with each other. The very fact that we are not God, but honour that God, could mean that we recognise our humanness and thus allow others and ourselves to be seen as vulnerable and fallible. Because we are all like that, we can understand it and forgive it in each other.
To dare to trust another human being is a sign of a very brave and deep relationship, one which does, indeed, involve faith in the other. How many of us think twice before we share parts of ourselves which we recognise as ambiguous, or unlikely to be acceptable to many people? Sometimes this involves asking hard questions about life and faith in general which we feel may shock those around us, or challenge their faith in God or in us. Sometimes it is about including and accepting people who are different. Having genuine faith in each other does create a context where we can truly be ourselves and where the other person can respond to us with the same level of honesty without fear.
Often these relationships, if they are genuine, do lead to a level of disagreement, but one in which there is room to move and a preparedness to still love each other. We can agree to continue working on, and engaging in dialogue, about the areas of disagreement. When we do this, it often leads to growth in our views of life and faith and a more profound trust than before. It is so much superior to relationships which pretend to be faithful, but which hide differences beneath meaningless smiles and pleasantries.
In all of this, the way we relate is a testimony to the way we understand our relationship with God. It reveals our humility before that God as we journey on together, our preparedness to forgive as we are forgiven and to “love our neighbour as ourselves”. It demonstrates the level of courage and depth in our faith, as we invite in each other daring ways of living out our faith together. In all of it, we show the world what it means to encircle each other with love and care as we face the challenges of life and death, so that we are never alone.
