Fr Laurence Freeman (who is a Benedictine monk), suggested in a recent lecture that, if we shared our failures, it could transform all of our lives. Instead of focussing on competing, we might encourage and comfort each other. We might establish a culture which was honest about everyone being human, possibly even celebrating the way humanness binds us together.
Imagine if political and other leaders shared their failures and then their genuine dreams and visions for who we might all be together. As we faced our own humanness, we might well discover that we look at each other with new eyes and become far less punishing and mean, especially in regard to those in need.
Successes could even be more special because we recognise that we have managed to move past a failure, to genuinely put it behind us to start again. Loving our neighbour as we love ourselves could take on an entirely different dimension. As we look at the neighbour, we could see a human person who is on the same vulnerable journey as ourselves and therefore relate to that neighbour with compassion and understanding. As we dare to share our own vulnerabilities, we could see that as daring to also love ourselves in a way which adds to our capacity to love others.
If we really lived together like that, it could transform the world. Obviously, if we were to try to bring in that change, some of us would need to have the courage to expose our own realities and to bear the consequences of doing that.
As I wrote this, I realised that, if I am serious about suggesting this way of living, I have to begin the process myself. So … I will share that I am a person who struggles with an over-large ego. As my beloved partner used to tell me before she died, “You are showing off again, darling. Stop drawing attention to yourself!” I’m sure that my children supported her in saying that and some of my brave friends, too. I am also ungrateful for my relatively good health and strength, too lazy to exercise properly, even though I have a gym close by and lots of opportunities to do more walking.
That is just a start! I don’t believe that any of us would be capable of sharing all our failures with others, but maybe we could at least begin in a modest way and together bring about a different society. Surely those of us who are religious could lead the way? If we truly believe in a gracious God, we can afford to be honest about ourselves. And knowing that we are not God, we could live in ways which are openly and truly human. May our God be with us, however we understand that God!
